Kuroko no Shitty Drabbles
by Mochisarecute357
Summary: These are CRACK drabbles my friend and I made. The pairs are every possible pair between the GOM, Kagami and Furihata.
1. KiKuro

**Ahahahaha... So these are a bunch of random crack oneshots that my friend and I made. Most of these have no dialogues and are very short (ehem mine ehem) because dialogues are hard and We don't know how to put them XD (espescially Sei). All the pairs are every possible pair between the GOM, Kagami and Furihata. We randomly chose which pair we write of and our plot are uhh random objects we picked through fate? so um hope you enjoy?**

 **..**

 **...**

 **...**

 **Pair: Kise and Kuroko**

 **Object Prompt: Paper**

 **(I wrote this one XD)**

Kise and Kuroko were classmates. Kise sat behind Kuroko. They had a quiz today that required paper. Kise didn't have any because he already ran out. He poked Kuroko's back.

"Ne, Kurokocchi. Can I have some paper~?" Kise asked.

Kuroko tore a sheet of paper from his pad and turned to Kise.

"Sure, here Kise-kun."

Kise brightened as he reached for the glorious paper but to his horror, the wind blew it away. Kise and Kuroko both went forward in an attempt to catch it but was met with each other's lips instead.

...

Let's just say that Kuroko never gave Kise paper EVER again.

 **PS: Oh and um again these are cracks so expect um chapters that defy the laws of physics and I got addicted to 'ever again' so you'll see that alot...and glorious. If anyone ever bother to read this, Thanks for reading!**


	2. MuraKuro

**MuraKuro: "HEADBAND"** **(mah friend's)**

One day, Kuroko suddenly found himself in a world full of headbands. The mountains were maid of headbands, the flowers and fruits, almost everything. From a distance, he saw a tower. Seeing that he had nothing better to do, he decided to go there. Up there, he saw maiden standing by a window with her back towards him. This maiden had long purple hair and Kuroko decided calling out to her. "Excuse me, where this place is?" he asked. At first, she didn't heard him but when she turned around, the maiden wasn't actually a maiden, but Murasakibara in a dress and a headband was pushing his bangs away from his face."Kurochin, do you have any food? I'm hungry." Murasakibara said. Kuroko dug into his pockets to check and sure enough, there was a headband-shaped candy in there. "Yes, I do." Kuroko answered. "Climb up and give it to me." Murasakibara said and took off his headband and his bangs fell down the bottom where Kuroko got crushed by the pile of hair. After brushing his way through, he climbed up and gave Murasakibara the candy after putting his headband back on again and pushing his bangs away.

"Thank you, and now, I shall reward you." Murasakibara said and ordered Kuroko to close his eyes which he did. Kuroko suddenly something hard wrapping around his body and when he opened his eyes, he saw that he was wearing an armor of headbands. Muraskibara said that Kuroko shall now be his knight in shining headband then ordered him to get more food and kicked him out of the window. Kuroko suddenly found himself in back in school again and found out that it was all just a dream. Later that day, he saw Muraskibara wearing a headband which made him stay away from him for now.


	3. AkaKaga

**Pair: Akashi and Kagami (mine)**

 **Object Prompt: Glasses (Spectacles)**

Akashi and Kagami go to the same school and unfortunately they are classmates. It wasn't really that unfortunate if you think about it but because of a certain event back then...

 _Kagami packed his stuff in his school bag. Classes were thankfully over. He was walking towards the door when he suddenly felt something beneath his foot which were glasses, panicking and not wanting to break them he lost his balance and toppled forward. It wouldn't be all that bad if it was just that but Akashi just HAD to be standing in front of him so he landed on the other, their lips colliding..._

 _..._

Kagami hated glasses ever since.

When Kuroko acquired glasses he exploded.


	4. MuraMido

**MuraMido: "FANFICTION"** **(mah friend's)**

For their literature class, Murasakibara and Midorima partnered up and they were assigned to do any form of narratives where the characters are supposed to be played by them, so they chose to make a fanfiction. Murasakibara didn't know how to make a story and the only stories that he ever knew were the romance novels that his sister read.

"So, what kind of story do you propose?" asked Midorima.

"Uuuhh…Once upon a time, there was a gazillionaire named Midochin and he met the most beautiful woman, me and-"

"No! What the hell is wrong with you?! We are obviously not doing that." Midorima was creeped out. Does Murasakibara swing that way?!

"Isn't that how you make a story? Does are the only kinds I know." Said Murasakibara. Now Midorima was even more creeped out, thinking that the tall kid's genre preferences were quite…not so manly. In the end, they couldn't come up with a different story, so they had to pass the draft that Murasakibara made.

 _Midochin and me had a fight the night we made love to each other. Midochin couldn't admit his love for me so I left him. After I left, Midochin finally realized his undying love for me and chased me to the airport. "I'm sorry, please come back. Let's talk about this." Midochin said. He got down on one knee, holding my hands in his. "You're the only woman…man?...person I will ever love. Will you marry me? " With tears in my eyes, I agreed to marry Midochin._

 _The end_

Their teacher looked at them wiredly, Midorima in a state of depression and embarrassment while Murasakibara didn't think anything was wrong with their weird story line and all the wrong grammars in their fanfiction. "So, what is your title?" the teacher asked. "The Adventures of Me and Midochin." Murasakibara answered. Midorima couldn't help but face palmed


	5. AoFuri

**Pair: Aomine and Furihata (Mine)**

 **Object Prompt: Shoes**

The Bench Trio (Furihata,Fukuda,Kawahara) were exiting the school gates of Seirin when Fukuda and Kawahara made fun of Furihata and in his rage he chased them in the streets, passing by and bumping into people. Furihata was lagging behind so he just decided in throwing his shoes at them. Kawahara got hit on the head but Fukuda didn't.

Aomine was crossing the road and he yawned when a shoe suddenly flew into his mouth...

"Wow Furi, I never knew you had a good aim..." said Fukuda while his face was like O_o.

After that Furihata never threw his shoes ever again.


	6. MidoKaga

**MidoKaga: "COTTON BUDS" (mah friend's)**

Kagami was cleaning his ear. His ear wax was so big and kind of wet that it covered the whole cotton bud and made it look like a lollipop. Midorima came up to him and asked for some cotton buds because it was his lucky item today. Suddenly Kuroko came up behind Kagami, startling him which caused his arms to jerk up out of reflex and hit Midorima. Kagami was closing his eyes during that time, and when he opened them, he saw that the cotton bud that was covered with his ear wax was shoved inside Midorima's nose.

The ear wax already hardened and it was so big that Midorima couldn't pull the cotton bud out anymore. "Kuroko, this all your faulit!" said. "Uuuuhhh…no, it was Kagami-kun's fault." Kuroko said and slowly disappeared using misdirection. When Kagami and Midorima couldn't pull it out, they decided to go to the doctor, but he was out and wouldn't be back for another week, so Midorima had to walk around with a stick up his nose for the whole week.


	7. MidoAka

**Pair: Midorima and Akashi (Mine)**

 **Object Prompt: Light bulb**

It was Christmas. Every Christmas, a member of the GOM throws a party. They switch every year and now it was Midorima's turn. Midorima finished decorating the Christmas tree when the light in the living room(where he was) went out. He sighed and went to their garage and got a new light bulb and a ladder. He went back to the living room and climbed on the ladder then he proceeded to change the bulb. Just as he finished, Akashi arrived and went in the living room (earlier than anyone else as always). He then passed by Midorima and at that moment, the old light bulb slipped from Midorima's grasp, not wanting to break it, he jumped for it, landing on Akashi in the process. Midorima found himself face to face with Akashi's crotch area when the rest of the GOM arrived, talk about perfect timing...

"..."

"..." *munch*

"Akashi..cchi...Mido..rimacchi..."

"Is this what you guys do when we're not around?"

Since then Midorima never threw a Christmas party at his house ever again, nor touched a light bulb moreover _change_ a light bulb.

He cringed when he's lucky item was a light bulb.


	8. AoKuro

**AoKuro (KuroAo?): "CHALK"** **(mah friend's)**

Aomine and Kuroko were the ones tasked to clean the classroom today. While cleaning, Kuroko noticed that something changed about his companion. "Aomine-kun, did you get darker?" he asked. Aomine didn't really mind the question because he was used to things when it comes to his complexion. While cleaning the blackboard, he noticed the chalk box on the top and when he tried to reach for it, the contents spilled all over him.

Now his face was covered with chalk powder and broken pieces of chalk were scattered all over from where he stood. "Aomine-kun, are you finally using glutathione?" Kuroko teased, his pokerface still on. Aomine got so pissed that he threw a handful of chalk at Kuroko. "You think this is funny?" Aomine wailed. "Just because you're so white while I'm so dark!"

Kuroko went up to Aomine, bringing his hand up and placing his palm on Aomine's right cheek. The scene would have been so touching and gay but Kuroko had to bring up a piece of chalk and started rubbing it all over Aomine. "You should have just said it if you wanted more." Kuroko said. What started as an accident and an exchange of a few harsh words became an all-out battle of throwing and rubbing chalk at each other until Aomine became white while Kuroko even whiter along with the whole classroom.

When Akashi came to check on them because they were already late for practice, he thought he was in heaven because the room was so white, and Kuroko and Aomine was standing in the middle of it, their bodies almost camouflaged, making their eyes look as if they were floating. "Didn't you know that chalk can cause you cancer?" Akashi said and ordered them to clean the place up as punishment for missing practice. When Akashi left, Kuroko turned to his partner and said in a monotonous voice, "Amazing Aomine-kun, your eyes look as if they were floating, just like when you're in the dark." And thus, commencing round two.


	9. AkaKuro

**Pair: Akahi and Kuroko (mine)**

 **Object Prompt: Lipstick**

One school day, Kuroko offered Akashi sweets. The redhead thought of this as highly suspicious and Kuroko's poker face was not helping. He looked at the 'sweets' seeing cylindrical 'candies' with different colors. Despite the disturbing feeling in his stomach, he took one of it anyway. He got the red one and ate it.

...

...

...

It was motherfucking lipstick.

"Happy April Fools Day Akashi-kun."

Enraged like never before, Akashi took out his trusty scissors and attempted to stab Tetsuya but he stabbed Murasakibara instead. Murasakibara only went there because he heard 'sweets' and this was what he got? Ouch. Literally. Midorima saw the spectacle (Me:haha pun) then dragged Murasakibara to the nurses office. Akashi tched at missing his target but he was not one to simply give up. He was Akashi freaking Seijuurou and no one pranks him and gets away with it. He chased Kuroko around the hole campus, stabbing Aomine and Kise along the way (it wasn't Akashi's fault that they were in his way). The two were outside the school building where tons of students were when he finally caught on Kuroko. He was about to grab Kuroko and stab him to death when he tripped over a pebble, grabbing Kuroko's pants instead.

...

...

That wasn't the plan but hey he got his revenge.


	10. MidoKuro

**MidoKuro: "MANNEQUIN LEG"** **(mah friend's)**

Midorima's lucky item of the day was a mannequin leg, so he brought one to school. At that time, Kuroko also brought another mannequin leg for their art class but he still needed another one. He then saw Midorima holding another mannequin leg that was same the same model as his, so he asked if he could borrow it. Midorima refused but Kuroko kept on insisting.

Then Akashi popped out of nowhere and suggest they should joust for it. Kuroko agreed and although, Midorima was reluctant over the idea, he agreed. They were now at the gym and since they didn't have any horse, Akashi ordered Aomine and Kise to be the horses. Midorima was riding Aomine and Kuroko on Kise. With their mannequin legs positioned, they waited for Akashi to give them the signal.

Aomine and Kise neighed.

"Neigh, neigh ssu~"

"Neigh - the only one who could ride me is me – neigh."

Akashi snapped his fingers (like a boss XD) and Aomine and Kise charged, complete with their battle cries while Midorima couldn't believe what was happening and Kuroko with his usual pokerface. They crashed into each other. Kuroko's mannequin leg was pierced into Midorima's mouth while Midorima's mannequin leg was shoved up Kuroko's ass. Aomine and Kise were sprawled on the floor.

Some teachers heard the commotion and told them to explain what atrocity they were doing. Akashi stepped forward. "Midorima and Kuroko were fighting over a mannequin leg, so they decided to joust for it. I tried to stop them, but they wouldn't listen to me, and Aomine and Kise even joined their ridiculous game and proposed to be their horses. I'm sorry about the trouble that we caused you. I'll take full responsibility over this." He explained. The teachers believed him and let him off while Midorima, Kuroko, Aomine and Kise were punished.

"Akashi, you bitch!" Aomine cursed while the rest couldn't do anything about it. On that day, only Aomine and Kise were punished to clean the bathrooms because Midorima and Kuroko had to be sent to the hospital to remove the mannequin leg from theer bodies. When they came back, the four of them were suspended for a week and Akashi finally got his long deserved break from his teammates.


	11. MuraKi

**Pair: Murasakibara and Kise (mine)**

 **Object Prompt: Wall clock**

The GOM, depite their relationship actually really care for each other so when they thought that Murasakibara had enough sweets and that he'd die soon if they don't stop him and that was why they deprived him of his sweets, stealing them and even tied Murasakibara to a chair in their secret base to keep him from eating and murdering them for stealing and depriving him of his precious babies. After about a week of deprivation, Kise was in charge of guarding Murasakibara.

Murasakibara wanted sweets so bad, everthing he looked at looked like food. That's why when he saw the wall clock that had a background of a cookie on it, he managed to rip the ropes off, shocking Kise who was busy fixing his face. Murasakibara lunged for the clock and started chewing on it. Because of his deprived state, he could only taste the glorious taste of cookies instead of cheap ass plastic. Kise tried to pry Murasakibara from the clock, failing because of the other ones' heaviness. Kise tried to stop him with a 'No, Murasakibaracchi, that's not fooood!' but Murasakibara wouldn't listen and continued on eating the poor wall clock. Efforts failing, he decided to take the wall clock from Murasakibara but the other suddenly bit his arm.

"Ouch! Muraskibaracchi stop it, I'm not food! TT^TT." Kise wailed trying to pry Muraskibara off but he continued on chewing on Kise's arm like a mad man. Just then, the GOM arrived witnessing the dilemma. They pried Muraskibara off of Kise and restrained him back to the chair with chains before Akashi stabbed him to stay still...for good.

"Man, he's fucking crazy without his sweets." Aomine muttered.

Ever since then the GOM never bothered to stop Murasakibara's unhealthy habit of eating too much sweets.


	12. AkaFuri

**AkaFuri: "POLE"** **(mah friend's)**

When Akashi's teammates still couldn't find a way to defeat him in anything, Reo decided to challenge Akashi in a pole dancing contest while a song about butts. With the condition that anyone who forfeits, loses, Akashi really couldn't say no because it would hurt his manly pride. After school, they went to a club somewhere far from the city. The bouncer wouldn't let them in because they were too young, but when Akashi talked to him, he lets them in, his face on the verge of crying.

Whoever has to most applause wins, said Reo. Once inside, Reo took stage the first and sang "Anaconda" by Nicki Minaj while dancing on the pole. A lot of dudes actually cheered for him so it was going to be a tough battle.

When Akashi finally got on stage, Furihata along with his old friends from middle school who forced him to come, entered the club (they paid the bouncer) and sat in the front table right next to the stage. Akashi didn't really paid any mind to them, but Furihata jawdropped, and couldn't process on the idea of what Akashi was doing on stage and if he happens to work there. When the song started, Akashi sang "Baby Got Back" by Sir Mix-a-Lot and began swaying, spinning, hanging and twerking on the pole, still full of elegance and grace. The crowd went wild, shouting, whistling and applauding Akashi while the whole time Furihata's already open mouth was practically on the floor.

When nearing the end of the song, the pole suddenly gave out and the bolts were unhinged due to Akashi's intensity. The pole flew up and was shot into Furihata's wide-open mouth. He started choking because it was blocking his windpipe. Akashi quickly yanked the pole off but Furihata was out of breath, so the only thing Akashi can do was give him mouth to mouth resuscitation.

…

On that day, Furihata was saved from almost dying by a pole and never went to a club ever again, and he always runs away, crying and screaming whenever he saw Akashi because he thought that Akashi really did worked as a pole dancer and tried to kill him that day so that he wouldn't tell anybody about it.


	13. KiFuri

**Pair: Kise and Furihata (mine)**

 **Object Prompt: Carrots**

Furihata was buying groceries for his mom. The only thing left on the grocery list were carrots. He went to where a huge pile of carrots are and proceeded to search for good ones when he suddenly noticed a stray of golden hair. Curious, he pulled it, heart almost stopping when a guy emerged from the carrots. Said guy was Kise, Kuroko's former team mate. He must have had a very horrified expression because the other started apologizing.

"Oh, sorry ! I must have frightened you! My name's Kise, and-hey! Aren't you one of Kurokocchi's team mates, what was your name again?"

"Furi..hata.."

"Well it was nice to meet you!" Kise shook his hand. Furihata still cannot believe he met Kise outside of basketball and was shaking hands with him in a grocery store while he was in a pile of carrots. "And you must be curious as to why I'm hiding in this pile of carrots-haha I remember Midorimacchi- that's because-" Suddenly, a huge hoard of fangirls approached them screaming 'KIIIIISSSSSSEEEEEEE-KYUUUUUN~!' "-of that...I have to get going now." Kise was about to go out of the pile when he tripped, landing on Furihata, their lips on each others'. Before Kise could process what was happening, Furihata shoved Kise off and ran away as fast as he could swearing to never go back to that grocery store ever again, WHO KNOWS WHO SAW THAT?!

Kuroko laughed so hard, milk shake squirted out of his nose.


	14. MuraFuri

**MuraFuri: "GRASS"** **(mah friend's)**

Seirin and Yosen decided to train together. They set up a picnic in a field next to a group of biker dudes who were drinking. One can of bottle suddenly got knocked and rolled towards them. Furihata didn't see the label and thought that it was theirs. He was so thirsty so he drank it which made him go high and drunk. When they were eating, Furihata who was still drunk, reached for the last piece of mojo and at the same time, Murasakibara also reached for it. Murasakibara glared at Furihata, and him being drunk, suddenly grew some balls and glared back. "Let go or I'll crush you." Murasakibara said. Furihata just sneered. "You let go, you giant eggplant!"

Since Murasakibara was still stronger, he easily snatched the mojo from Furihata. Because of this, Furihata, fuelled with rage tackled Murasakibara, pushing him down on the grass. He grabbed a fistful of grass and shoved it down Murasakibara's throat. Murasakibara managed to flip them over, and he spit the grass in his mouth on Furihata's face. He rolled Furihata so that he was now on his stomach, grabbing his head and rubbing his face on the dirt, making him eat the grass and a bit of dirt.

Furihata managed to flip himself over and spit the grass on his hand and shoved them on Murasakibara's mouth. He also grabbed a pile of dirt with a little bit of worms in it and also shoved them on Murasakibara's mouth. Murasakibara couldn't take it anymore so he released everything and barfed on Furihata's face.

When their teammates got back, they found Furihata and Murasakibara on the ground, their mouth stuffed with grass and there was an awful stench surrounding them. Since then, Furihata has been afraid of Murasakibara , and the said giant also avoids him as much as possible.


	15. KiKaga

**Pair: Kise and Kagami (mine)**

 **Object Prompt: Necktie**

The Seirin, Kaijo, Yosen, Touou, Shuutoku and Rakuzan teams were playing a game called 'Hide the Necktie' where you hide your necktie somewhere on your body and the other players have to take it from you somehow and vice versa. The winner would be the last one standing. If someone finds your tie and takes it from you, you're out.

After alot of stripping, ripping, touching and screams of loss, the only one's standing were Kise and Kagami (Yes Sei lost deal with it) They tackled each other and started ripping each others clothes and touching parts where they could have hidden each others' ties. They were down to their pants when Kagami yelled a "Where the fuck are you hiding your tie?!" "Well I wouldn't tell you Bakagamicchi!" They continued molesting each other when Kise became victorious finding Kagami's tie tied to his foot and taking it.

"I can't believe you won! Where the heck are you hiding your necktie?!" Kagami questioned feeling horrible because he lost. Kise winked.

"That's a secret~."

Kasamatsu didn't even want to know.


	16. KuroFuri

**KuroFuri: "CAMERA" (mah friend's)**

One time, Furihata bought a very expensive camera. He brought it to school and everybody from the basketball club flocked around him. And when they started fighting over it, Furihata asked Kuroko to stop them because they might break it. Of course, nobody noticed Kuroko so he decided to use Ignite Pass Kai and sent the camera crashing on the wall, breaking it into pieces.

Furihata ran to his camera, crying over the loss of his precious camera. When Kuroko came up behind him to apologize, Furihata was startled, turning around, losing his balance and falling down. His butt landed on the shards broken camera and some of the sharp pieces were pierced inside his butt hole. He stood up and there, Kuroko saw a very large piece sticking out from his ass.

"I'm really sorry, Furihata-kun." He said calmly but sincerely while Furihata kept running around, screaming in pain. To make it up to him, Kuroko took another large and sharp piece from the pile and thrust it up his own ass. "See, now we're even" Kuroko said.

"That doesn't make me feel any better." Furihata cried. They were sent to the hospital to be treated. All that time, Kuroko only had a pokerface while the piece was removed from his butt which creeped Furihata and especially, the doctor out very much.


	17. AoAka

**Pair: Aomine and Akashi**

 **Object Prompt: Tape**

 **(MINE)**

Aomine needed to put plastic cover on his notebook but he didn't have any scissors to cut the tape so he asked Akashi for help. Akashi was sitting regally when he approached him. Since the redhead liked cutting stuff with his scissors anyway, he helped Aomine. Aomine peeled the tape and Akashi was going to cut it when Kuroko accidentally bumped into Akashi's chair making him cut Aomines finger instead and since Akashi's scissors were very intense, it cut the finger off.

...

...

...

"Oh, sorry I stumbled." Kuroko deadpanned.

After that, Kuroko went home to a dead Nigou.

 **PS: I'm so sorry I killed Nigou XD**


	18. MidoKi

**MidoKi: "ROPE"** **(mah friend's)**

Midorima's lucky item of the day was a rope. He thought the longer the rope, the luckier he would be, so he brought 7 meters of it. When he got to the gym, it was still empty. Just then, he received a text from Kise, telling him to the rooftop because there was an emergency. Midorima told him that he didn't care but still went anyway, bringing his two meters rope with him. At the top, Kise told Midorima because he heard that Midorima brought a rope with him to school today and that he needed Midorima to lower him down in front of Kuroko's classroom because he wanted to surprise Kuroko for his birthday.

Midorima refused, saying that it was too dangerous, quickly adding that the rope might break and leaving him without a lucky item. But Kise insisted, saying that he'll be careful and he's not heavy anyway, even bringing up his shirt and showing Midorima his fabulous abs. Midorima smacked him on the head for being so uncouth, but in the end he got Midorima to comply and tied the rope around his waist. When Midorima was already lowering Kise down, a gust of wind suddenly swooped by, causing Kise to swing frantically sidewards. This caused Midorima to lose his balance and he accidentally lets go of the rope. Luckily for Kise, but not for Midorima (even though it was his lucky item) the rope had a loop at the end, and when it sprung up, it went through Midorima's head closed around his neck.

Midorima started chocking until he couldn't breathe anymore, and passed out. When Kise couldn't hear Midorima answering him anymore, he had no choice but climb up which caused the loop to tighten even more around Midorima's neck. When he reached the top, Midorima was already blue. Kise didn't know what to do, so the only thing he could think of was to give Midorima CPR and pounded his chest, yelling, "Live, Midorimacchi! Live!" He never even thought of loosening the rope. Kise dragged him to the nurse's office without ever taking the rope off his neck. Because he had his lucky item with him that day, Midorima miraculously lived.


	19. AoKi

**Pair: Aomine and Kise (mine)**

 **Object Prompt: Car**

Aomine was leisurely driving a car in the middle of the night. He was enjoying the nice view of the starry night sky and car-less roads when he suddenly hit someone. He stopped the car immediately and went out of it. He held the body of the person in his arms who turned out to be Kise. His head was all bloody and Aomine told him to hang in there and that he was going to call an ambulance. Kise shook his head.

"I-it's okay Aomi..necchi..." Kise said in a raspy voice. "I was actually being hunted by a bunch of scary fangirls..and I-I'd rather die in your arms Aomine..cchi.." Kise coughed then smiled. Aomine cannot believe what was happening...So many questions are buzzing in his head but mainly H _ow come I have a car when I'm still in middle school? No, scratch that. How did he even know how to drive?_ Plus Kise is being way too dramatic... He'd rather die in Aomine's arms, seriously? But for some reason even though he thought of yelling at him and ACTUALLY calling an ambulance, his body moved on its own, holding Kise's hand.

"What the fuck are you saying?! Don't say shit like that!" Well at least he did yell at him. Although for another weird reason...he felt sad and..dare he think it heartbroken what the hell?! Heck he even felt tears prickling at the corner of his eyes. Kise wiped the tears with his free hand and cupped Aomine's cheek.

" ...cchi...Kiss me for the last time..." Okay hold on..what the fuck? What in the basketball was he saying. Aomine couldn't control his body though. He felt himself getting closer to Kise's face and when their lips almost touched...

...

Aomine jolted awake. He had slept in class. Again.

"Ughhhhhhh...what the-" Aomine wiped his eyes then he suddenly heard Kise calling out to him.

He will never see him the same way ever again.


	20. MuraKaga

**MuraKaga: "WAX"** **(mah friend's)**

Kagami was dared to get a leg wax and at that same day, Murasakibara was also dared to get a wax in exchange for a bag of snacks and candies. They were both surprised when they were both put in the same room together. They were both asked to wait for their respective doctors. While they were lying there, a gust of wind suddenly came, causing the door to open, blowing a strip of wax paper that was already opened and flying right into Kagami's face.

Kagami started panicking, so Murasakibara peeled the wax from his face along with his right eyebrow. "Since one is already off, let's get rid of the other one." Murasakibara said. Kagami tried to stop him but Murasakibara already opened a new strip, sticking it on Kagami's left eyebrow and pulled. Kagami screamed in pain and at losing both of his eyebrows.

Out of anger, he grabbed a bigger strip of wax and instead of sticking it on Murasakibara's eyebrows, he stuck it on the giant kid's hair. When Murasakibara pushed him away, Kagami was holding onto the paper which caused a portion of Murasakibara's hair to be torn off. Murasakibara howled in pain and at the fact that he now has a bald spot.

They continued throwing wax at each other and ripping each other's skin, hair, even body hair. They even yanked each other's pants and underwear off and almost waxed their balls off. When their commotions were heard, they were thrown out of the establishment with their whole bodies sore and with the little hair they had left.


	21. KiAka

**Pair: Kise x Akashi**

 **Object Prompt: Whip cream**

 **(same universe as the light bulb one)**

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

Kise sucked at baking and Kuroko's birthday was nearing. He wanted to bake a cake for him so he asked Akashi to help him bake one since he was perfect at everything. They started practicing. Kise had a bowl full of whip cream when he suddenly slipped and spilled it all over his pants.

"Nooooo! This pants were expensive!" Kise wailed.

Akashi rolled his eyes and approached to help when he, himself slipped on the said whip cream, his face landing on Kise's crotch area, causing some of the cream stay on his face. Suddenly, the rest of the GOM arrived and saw the scene.

"..."

"IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!"

"...pfft." Kuroko took a picture for blackmail.

"...munch..."

"ehem..." Midorima coughed awkwardly, suddenly remembering the light bulb incident. He shuddered.

"Wow...the heck Akashi first Midorima and now Kise?"

...

The next day, Kise woke up with only random patches of his glorious, golden hair left.

 **PS: So far sorry if there are tons off terrible grammar and spelling and choice of words. English is not our first language.**


	22. MidoFuri

**MidoFuri: "TOILET"** **(mah friend's)**

In the wintercup stadium, after their match, Midorima had to go to the toilet. The kind that had more space and was separated from the restroom. After taking a dump, while he was about to flush it, Furihata suddenly came raging in because Midorima forgot to lock the door. "What the hell are you doing here?!" Midorima exclaimed angrily. "I'm sorry, I didn't know it was occupied!" Furihata cried and tried to go out but found out that the door was jammed, so the two of them got trapped inside.

Midorima was on the verge of exploding out of anger but decided to just wait until somebody saves them. Furihata told Midorima that he really needs to take a dump, so Midorima turned around to give him some privacy. Since the floor was quite slippery, Furihata suddenly slipped. Midorima turned around and saw that Furihata was crouched on the floor, his head inside the toilet.

When Furihata raised his head out of the toilet, he was already in tears because there was a few smears of dirt on his face which was Midorima's dump that he forgot to flush. Seeing that it was quite his fault for not flushing awhile ago, he helped Furihata sit up on the toilet, and since Furihata was still poopish and he couldn't take it anymore, he dumped in his pants, which startled Midorima and caused him to slip forward, his mouth landing on Furihata's open ones.

When somebody opened the door, they saw two men inside, one who had a pair of soiled pants and a foul odor around him, and one who was sulking while sitting on a lidded toilet bowl. From that moment on, Midorima decided to wait until he gets home if he ever needed to do his business on the toilet again.


	23. KagaKuro

**Pair: Kagami and Kuroko  
Object Prompt: Glue**

 **(sequel to whip cream)**

 **.**

 **.**

 **.**

It was Kagami's birthday. Kuroko remembered that Kise gave him a cake for his birthday. Ahhh... The sweet, sweet picture of blackmail. Therefore, he thought of baking a cake as a present for him. He thought of what the flavor could be and he went with white chocolate.

The next day, Kuroko arrived at Kagami's house and gave him the cake. They went inside and Kagami opened the box to see the cake in all it's glory. The cake looked weird. Kuroko said it was white chocolate. Kagami felt something pulling in his stomach to not eat the cake but he saw Kuroko's expectant face and it would be rude not to so he ate all of it. The cake tasted so fucking bad, like he had to really swear in his mind just to emphasize it but Kuroko smiled so he thought it was kind of worth it.

Suddenly, Kagami fainted, foam forming in his mouth. Kuroko panicked and sent him to the hospital. When Kuroko got home, he thought of what he had done wrong with the recipe. His eyes suddenly drifted to the glue that was beside the whip cream.

...

Well shit.

"I am so sorry, Kagami-kun." Although his amused tone betrayed his words.

Kuroko never told Kagami that he accidentally made him eat glue, and a lot of it at that.


End file.
